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Recently dumped by girlfriend Lizzie - who is now his boss - office worker Sam Pinkett is the sole witness to a car crash on a lonely country road. Sam picks up an abandoned phone and hears an Oriental voice say, If you are not here by 5 o'clock we will kill your wife. Phil Bourne, the office mailroom boy, who still lives with his mum and craves excitement, encourages Phil to save the woman, keeping their involvement secret from the police, Lizzie and Sam's office rival Noel. The caller addresses Sam as Mr Stevens so the two men decide to visit Stevens at the local hospital, where Sam is almost operated on by accident and the man Sam believes to be Stevens is somebody else entirely. The pair thus decide to face the kidnappers alone.

Secret Service agent Jack Walker shoots a man with a stun gun and takes him prisoner. Phil and Sam are also taken prisoner by the real Stevens, who claims that he sent money to his wife's abductor, Mr Lau, a casino owner to whom he owed gambling debts, but it somehow never arrived. He sends the lads to meet Lau with an empty case and they try to bluff him into thinking they have the money to release Scarlett, Stevens' wife. However the deceit is rumbled and they flee, taking with them Lau's nephew Jason, whom they tie up behind the council boardroom. Unfortunately Mr Lau tracks them down and turns up at the office.

Seeing Lau's van pull up outside the office Phil sneaks in and frees Scarlett and he and Sam take her to Phil's house where Linda, Phil's mum, mistakes her for Phil's girlfriend. They then return her to Stevens but she is so angry with him she hits - and accidentally kills - him, ungratefully telling the police on the phone that Phil and Sam were the culprits. They flee again and are saved by agent Walker, who is seeking Russian spy Marat Malankovic, and seems to think the lads are involved. Stevens is killed by double-crossing fellow agent Smoke and, opening his car boot, they find huge sums of money, plus the man he stunned and abducted, who also mentions Malankovic before running away.

After confiding in her father Mr Reid, the council supremo, that a music box has gone missing from her safe, Scarlett contacts Phil and Sam and demands they return it or else she will tell the police they killed Stevens. They discover it was sold to Marat Malankovic and set out to buy it with the money found in the car boot but they are pursued by Lau, who takes all the cash. They arrive at Marat's house intending to steal the box and find a party in progress, during which Phil saves Marat from an attempt to kill him. The grateful Russian gives the lads the music box by way of thanks but MI5 have discovered that they are driving the deceased Walker's car.

Sam gives Scarlett the music box but Phil has discovered why she was so desperate for its return. In it is hidden a memory stick which shows her having sex with transport minister Ian Culverson in order to blackmail him into approving an unpopular land deal which will make her father wealthy but leave Lizzie to take the blame. Following their involvement with two murders and deal with Lau the boys attract the attention of MI5 boss Ms Cox, who sends agents after them. Smoke kills Malenkovic before, accompanied by several of his colleagues and a helicopter, pursuing Phil and Sam.

Thanks to some nifty driving by Phil the pair escape from Smoke and jump a train to bring them back to town. They turn up at the council's big gala dinner with the evidence to trap Scarlett and her father but are side-tracked when Smoke abducts Lizzie and threatens to kill her unless he is given the documents Marat gave the boys. This leads to a show-down with MI5 agents firing off against each other and Phil and Sam literally caught in the middle. However right prevails and it even looks as it Sam will be getting back with Lizzie.

Phil and Sam are presumed dead, killed by a car bomb, but are on a witness protection scheme in Texas, working under assumed names. Unlike Phil, who loves it, Sam is homesick and wants to find out who tried to kill them. Learning that his mother is ill Phil agrees they should return and are introduced to sinister Carlos Espinosa, who gives them new identities. They leave work one step ahead of Marat's vengeful brother Yuri, who is out to get them but they are arrested at the airport.

Busted out of prison and soaring away from Texas, Sam and Phil's spirits are momentarily lifted, until another case of mistaken identity finds them risking their lives again. Their only hope is to play their part in a high-stakes heist with a ruthless gang of mercenaries.